“Sparkling blue ocean water filling the sight. Soft sun rays embracing the flawed skin. Air flowing with the smell of fresh sauteed prawns and mushrooms. Messed up curly brown pigtails, shining against the falling sunlight ,with the diamonds,made by the reflecting light, studded in the braids.
Little red crabs, clicking their claws, sprinting around the big stones. They ran in search of something, and that right there resembled all of us. Running and chasing something or someone. Screaming and crying and yelling, cursing fate for the failure. Nevertheless rushing behind to get there. Stretching the elastic till it’s limit is injured. Heedlessly, haring off the paths to be chosen.
Brown scar, near the thumb nail of the left foot, covered with sand. The thin cuts on the fingers made from the barks, brought for the bonfire. Dry cracked lips curled up into an arc and called out my name.
Science could not even explain the interaction force felt at the very moment, when the symphony was heard by me.
60 seconds or 20 more. I was still floating on the water. The flailing stopped. Staring her stand, waiting for me, i just kept staring at her. Shielding her face, using her right hand, she titled her head to the right. While her eyebrows crinkled together and eyes became narrower, she placed her left hand on the curve of her thin waist. The dry yet pink lips murmured something, and oh, how I could sense it all she meant.
My eyes twitched, my legs stiffened, my hands froze, my brain sent no signals to my organs. Words were stuck in my own cage of ruminations. Scream should have leaped over the hurdles put forward by the brain, which was already tangled up, as it was too stuck in the ocean of thoughts, but all that was done made the lungs to trap water in them.
No. Not yet. Not so soon. No. This cannot be the end of me. There are conversations to be talked, poetries to be woven with the 26 alphabets, sunrises waiting to be obsessed over, places to be explored, roads to be taken all alone under the night sky.
Void filled the eyes and then it creeped to the heart and slowly took control over the corpse I’ve become.
Blue, blue, blue. That’s what was in my sight. Then surface above me, sparkling with the sunrays falling on it, dancing as the breeze hit it.
I fought, I swam, I flipped my hands. I tried hard to get back to the shore, or at least out of this void. But then, what should I fight for? So I stopped, frozen. And the darkness prevailed. I lost, again, and for the last time. This is the end. The finish line has been drawn here.
A hand grabbed me by my waist, I felt it. Was it afterlife? Or was I still behind the finish line? Oh, I want to be on the other side of the world. Pushing the hand off me, I kicked the living thing off. But it grabbed on me, harder yet moderately. Pulling me closer to itself, it swam to the top, like it was reaching for the sky to get out of the water. The waves were fast, the sun was hiding behind the clouds, the birds could be heard twittering, the warmth of the human could be felt around my body.
I stopped opposing, i stopped swimming, i stopped looking, and i hoped i could stop breathing. The world around me disappeared. The sound of the waves hitting stones was inaudible. The body could not hold on for too long, and so,it gave up.
Oxygen rushed through my whole body and i chocked on water, spitting it all out. The blurred vision lasted for a while, but then I saw her, weeping with a smile on her face. How stupid are we humans? We cry when we’re sad or angry or hurt, and even when we are happy. Seeing the face lighting up with happiness was enough to make me smile. Then, she was not alone. There was this person, sitting on the rocks beside the barbeque, watching me lay on the golden sand.
His grey eyes were filled with hope and dreams, and his golden-brown messed up hair were ornamented just perfectly over his head. The blue shorts hung over his waist, just below the toned abs. He offered his arm towards me, so he could hold me again. But, I kept on laying there, appreciating the beauty of God’s art. His lips curled up into a smirk as he tilted his head a little bit to the left and said ” Couldn’t find a better place to drown? Beaches, like this, are not suicide destinations.”
Yet, I kept on being still, like a corpse, as I was dead. Because I was dead, my body wasn’t giving up on me, but me? If you ask about me, I had given up already in the water. The finish line couldn’t be reached, and the victory couldn’t be celebrated now. And that’s how I kept laying over there, lifeless yet alive.”
P. S. I’m always here if you want to talk 🙂
-Khushi aka herfinesmile